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How do I ask for a prenup?

If you are a child of divorce, you probably have very clear memories of the drama your parents went through during that time. Perhaps you witnessed screaming fights or the cancerous tension that grew into lifelong resentment. Maybe, after the divorce was over, you watched your custodial parent struggle to make ends meet because the divorce left him or her with nothing.

While there are common factors present in many divorcing couples, the results are personal, and you may still be dealing with the emotional trauma of that period in your life. This may be the driving reason behind wanting a prenuptial agreement. If you and your beloved have already agreed to marry, you may be wondering how to raise the topic of making a premarital contract.

Getting to the point

Honesty may be your best approach when raising the subject of a prenuptial agreement. In fact, many couples discover that talking about their fears and expectations of the future opens lines of communication they otherwise may have left closed. Of course, you may find that a delicate balancing act is necessary since honesty can sometimes be brutal.

Taking the time to reassure your intended throughout the discussion may be a helpful approach. For example, you may wish to remind your loved one of the benefits of a prenuptial agreement, including:

  • Security for you or your intended if one of you hopes to stop working and stay home with the children.
  • Agreement if you or your intended comes to the marriage with more money than the other.
  • Protection if one of you has considerable debt.
  • Control over your future rather than leaving it for the Wisconsin courts to decide.
  • Decisions made while you still want the best for each other instead of at a time when you are on the cusp of a breakup.

Preparing for the prenuptial discussion can be as important as preparing for a marriage proposal. Choosing the right place and time, and setting the mood, may make a difference in the way your beloved receives the suggestion. For example, you will definitely want to have some privacy and ensure there is no tension between you, so beginning the conversation right after an argument or while your future in-laws are visiting may not be a wise decision.

You may also find that seeking legal assistance at this time will prove beneficial. You will likely gain advice about how best to present the idea to your intended as well as counsel on the most appropriate factors to include in your prenuptial agreement.

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